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CSotD: No knife could cut our hearts in two

Ann Telnaes leads off on a day that will be a combination of political commentary and Valentine’s Day cartooning with her own combination of political commentary and Valentine’s Day cartooning.

I saw another of those videos the other day where some schmuck proposes to his GF on the Jumbotron at a crowded sports event, and, when I say I “saw” it, that doesn’t mean I “watched” it, because it’s a sad, cruel control game, and the outcome is irrelevant.

That is, she might say “yes” because of the pressure he’s put her under, but then I hope to God she says “no” once they’re alone, and not just to the marriage but to the whole thing. Run away and don’t look back.

Funny thing about control freaks is how insecure they are, which is why they frame things in these extravagant ways.

When I was a kid, some Atlantic City boardwalk sharpie enlisted my roughly 12-year-old sister to help him demonstrate his hair goo, and had her run her hand over her hair as he said, “There! That’s not at all greasy, is it?”

And she said “No,” because she was roughly 12 but as soon as we were away from the crowd, she started looking for a place to wash that greasy crap off her hand.

Funny story.

Not funny version of the story came some 30 years later when a co-worker found an ad in the paper and a message on the local Holiday Inn’s signboard saying “Marry me, Laurie!” which sure seemed romantic except that they’d broken up some time ago and he had become a stalker, leaving notes on her car and phoning at odd hours and saying things that began with “If I can’t have you …”

So, yeah, I’m not much into the Grand Public Gesture.

And even more painful is seeing the conman, the bully, the abuser, for what he is, and seeing someone you care about not be able to see what seems so obvious to everyone else.

Perfect metaphor for our nation.  Good work.

 

Juxtaposition of the Day

(Matt Davies)

(Rob Rogers)

I don’t even know why we have to have this discussion, except that con men are everywhere and those Nigerian princes would stop sending out emails if nobody ever responded.

Are we allowed to say that the fossil fuel industry spends a lot of money in order to get legislators to vote their way? Or is that carbonophobic hate speech?

Well, they do, and right now the effort, as Davies notes and as was said here yesterday, is to brush off the Green New Deal as something that can’t work and costs too much and we just can’t do.

And cigarettes don’t cause cancer, which isn’t relevant but I still had some Tobacco Institute money I hadn’t spent yet.

So instead of talking about reducing pollution from aircraft — perhaps by improving their technology but, in the meantime, not using them frivolously — and maybe cutting back on the number of cattle, whose technology is pretty fixed but whose levels of milk and meat production could be reduced, let’s just pretend that there’s no middle ground.

And that it’s just silly to think that our actions could have impact on the environment.

But, meanwhile, the national debt increases and, of course, the way to solve that is to collect fewer taxes.

And speaking of deliberately missing the point, Rogers can be faulted for being obvious, but, then again, did you think subtlety was going to work on this crew?

Of course Jesus preached socialism and the Apostles imposed it upon their followers and if you call yourself a Christian …

… well, if you call yourself a Christian on the Jumbotron in front of thousands of people, it’s not about agape, it’s about control.

Jesus specifically, directly warned against those who pray on the street so that all can see them pray, but those who pray on the street continue to do so.

 

Juxtaposition of the Holiday

(Loose Parts)

(Ben)

Ben was taking a risk, but it looks like he got away with it. You can pull the unexpected early in a relationship, or late in a relationship, but if you do it late, it’s more of a challenge because, by then, the unexpected has become the default.

The saving grace being that, if she still loves you after all those years, even stupid gestures are part of your endearing, enduring charm.

As for being in love with a mime, I’m a little less optimistic about the longevity of that, but you have to understand that my folks took me to see Marcel Marceau when I was eight.

Talk about setting the bar high. If that was the first mime you’d ever seen, it would hardly be surprising that the next 60 years would feature one disappointment after another.

 

The romantic angle being that, as seen in today’s Reply All, mimes and clowns are just one more religious issue for couples to confront.

 

And, yes, I am just barely old enough that I saw both Lou Jacobs and Emmett Kelly perform live.

My parents didn’t just spoil me — they ruined me completely.

 

They also got me a dog and she was terrific, but somehow subsequent dogs have readily and easily lived up to that high standard.

As Maria Scrivan declares, it is in their nature.

In fact, two of them just demonstrated it, upstaging Jacksonville Jaguars’ placekicker Josh Lambo at what was supposed to be a photo op in which he signed his new contract with the team.

Love means never having to say “Get off the table.”

 

A different, but also loyal, kind of Rover.

Our kids will be able to say that we gave them Opportunity.

Nicely noted, xkcd.

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