CSotD: Perhaps the End of the Beginning

Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps,
the end of the beginning. Winston Churchill

Ann Telnaes declares wake-up time, and I like the substitution of an alarm clock for a sword, because we’re not sure of the outcome but it seems that the time for a hundred visions and revisions has passed and, to quote a quite different, naturalized Brit, “Hurry up, please: It’s time.

I also appreciate the chintzy, over-elaborate bed, suitable for the sort of Byzantine bordello decor Dear Leader prefers, and the roller in his beautifully coiffed hair, though I’m not sure such a studiously vain narcissist would make the mistake of sleeping in his makeup.

But let’s be fair. The news keeps repeating that Trump is the first ex-president to be charged with a crime, which is true, but mostly because Jerry Ford pardoned Nixon so we could all get back to work.

I liked Ford, but his plan to repair the country didn’t last long and a lot of the Watergate reforms have since been watered down or abandoned entirely.

And then there’s the case of John Tyler, “His Accidency,” who, as vice-president, rose to the presidency upon the death of William Henry Harrison but who failed to win the office on his own. However, in the nearly four years of his presidency, he did manage to survive two attempts at impeachment and, later on, proved himself, by contrast, competent at insurrection, voting with other Virginia legislators to secede from the Union.

He’d have likely been charged with something or other once the insurrection was snuffed out, but he had, in the meantime, himself been snuffed out, by a stroke in the early days of the rebellion.

Also in the interests of fairness, Ratt gets this one bassackwards, because — aside from Stormy being a whole lot cuter than that — Trump did not hand her a bag of cash. If he had, we wouldn’t be watching jury selection this morning, because there’s nothing wrong with paying off a sex partner to insure her silence.

Well, there’s all sorts of things “wrong” about it, but nothing illegal, though if you pay her off before you have sex, Lenny Briscoe is going to want to discuss it with you.

Trump reportedly wanted to pay off Karen McDougal — the Playboy model with whom he had an extended affair — in cash, but his attorney, Michael Cohen, warned him against it, so McDougal and Daniels were paid by a shell company.

Which is too bad because it’s the shuffling around and lying about the money that he’s being charged with. SX2BU.

The whole thing, plus losing in the E. Jean Carroll sexual assault case and the NYS fraud case, has left Dear Leader scrambling for cash, as Adam Zyglis reminds us.

And, no, I don’t know why he can’t just borrow some from his son-in-law, who left the White House with full pockets, but I also don’t know why Jarvanka have suddenly gone silent and I don’t trust either of them. Perhaps Daddy doesn’t either, but I don’t think I’d put money on that.

The historians are going to have fun with all this someday, if history is still permitted.

Still, there’s a MAGAt born every minute, and Paul Fell comments on the latest scams, though the Washington Post published a gentle story explaining that the suckers who bought the stock seem happy to have supported the team and don’t mind waddling around with their financial pants around their ankles.

After all, Saints fans may have worn paper bags over their heads, but they still bought season tickets and showed up for the games.

Fell’s logic is, IMHO, slightly off, but not much. Trump Stock could go down to zero, and we should remember than any hopes of suing Ken Lay for tanking Enron disappeared when he died, since you can’t recover from his widow. (Nicole and Ron’s families are attempting to get the money they’re owed from OJ’s estate, but that debt was established while he was still alive.)

As for the Bibles, Roz Chast notes that encyclopedias have no resale value, to which I would add that they’re becoming impossible to give away even to used book sales and suchlike. I was fortunate to hand mine off to a home for troubled teens in the days before the Internet rendered them obsolete.

Others have pointed out that anyone who wants a Bible can get one for free from the Gideons, though the advantage of the Trump Bible is that it’s combined with a copy of the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence and the lyrics of Lee Greenwood’s “I’m Proud to be an American,” all of which are also available for free, but without the imprimatur of a man who many MAGAts equate with Jesus Christ.

Which, if they’re right, means that, while the encyclopedia is not updatable, the Bible might be.

And if they’re wrong, they can demand their money back from somebody or other.

After all, presidential memorabilia is always a good investment.

Juxtaposition of the Other Side of the Aisle

Gary Varvel — Creators

Morten Morland

Two views of Iran’s counterattack on Israel in retaliation for the bombing of Iran’s embassy in Damascus, one by Gary Varvel, who apparently has not bothered to read the news, and one by Morten Morland, who knows that US and British forces were actively involved in the defense against Iranian rockets, though he doesn’t appear to think it’s a good situation.

Which brings us back to Daniel Patrick Moynihan, since both cartoonists are entitled to their opinions but Morland also brings some facts to the game.

Finally, in honor of the day, Michael Ramirez (Creators) offers this challenging proposal.

It’s plainly true that, if we were paying our taxes today and voting tomorrow, things would change dramatically, because candidates would be competing to see who could offer the most relief to unhappy taxpayers.

But I’m not sure the results would “fix our tax system” because their pre-election promises would likely be totally preposterous and unworkable.

I note, BTW, that the people who most hate paying taxes seem to be the people who most hate the deficit. And love our country. And buy Bibles from lying, racist fornicators.

Plus ça change.

10 thoughts on “CSotD: Perhaps the End of the Beginning

  1. Hi Mike–it looks like the WaPo article is behind a paywall. I still have some articles to share, so here’s a link: https://wapo.st/4aV2TtP

    Now could someone explain why they’re happy with shoveling their entire savings down a rat hole? At least with a boat you might get to go out on the water every now and then.

  2. I think the reason Kushner hasn’t bailed out his father-in-law is self-evident: that would be accepting family-earned graft and Trump will never spend money he thinks is his to pay his fines if he can get a grifter moron from California or other assorted willing MAGAts to pay them for him.

    1. Thanks for the link – the blind trust those people have in a con man is (to me) staggering. And as for the woman who wants to make short sales illegal b/c they’re stealing her money… I guess she’s never read a brokerage disclaimer about stock performance. Oh, well, TFG loves the uneducated.

  3. “Coiffed,” please, not “quaffed.” The image of anyone taking a giant swig of TFG’s hair is more than I can bear.

  4. ‘Roz Chast notes that encyclopedias have no resale value’
    However, our organization still keeps a 1980’s set of encyclopedia brittanica available for its many eclectic and historical bits of information and statistics. It is decidedly anglophillc (is that a word?), which often adds an interesting cultural distortion to the writing. And, It is used about once a week.

  5. An internet search can’t replicate the experience of paging through the clear-plastic-overlay anatomical diagrams in the encyclopedia. Or poring over the full color pages of gemstones or heraldic symbols. Or just pulling a random volume off the shelf to read a random article on a rainy day (although maybe going down a Wikipedia wormhole is a little similar.)

    As for taxes, I actually paid less this year. And my investment account has recovered nicely after the beating it took during COVID.

  6. Really like how Ann Telnaes depicts the Orange Gremlin all alone in his single bed – surely a KING single, fit for His Infernal Majesty. The missus, meanwhile, tosses and turns in a separate bedroom at the opposite end of the premises, securely behind her dead-bolted door, slumbering fitfully as she ponders her ever-dwindling divorce settlement.

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