CSotD: Whatever Bull the Market Will Bear
Skip to comments
This Pat Byrnes panel is funny enough in a New Yorker way — his more usual spot — but the real laugh is that, as noted in the margin, he didn't sell it to the New Yorker but to the Wall Street Journal.
Of course, the gag is that, notwithstanding my talk the other day of people who walk out of immoral jobs, people who ask themselves these questions don't often make it to positions where what they think matters.
The "Have you no shame?" gag has been the hallmark of the New Yorker for years, but seems awfully biting here, given the odd split personality of the WSJ.
When I was on the business beat, I read the Journal every morning, and would find, in the news, a relatively sane story saying that such-and-such a world leader was heroically working to help deeply impoverished people, then turn to the editorial section and find an utterly batshit editorial about what a disgusting, despicable commie the guy was.
This was not my own insight; it was an industry joke. Most major papers had a wall between the newsroom and the editorial page, but not one topped with broken glass and barbed wire.
The other factor that surprises me is that, back in the 90s when I was doing all that, the "Salt & Pepper" cartoon section of the WSJ was as morbidly humorless as the rest of the editorial section, with incredibly lame gags.
However, in recent years I have seen cartoons that ran there and showed actual wit.
I suppose the moral of the story is that freelancers should keep up with the markets, because they change.
Of course, my experience as a freelance writer was the opposite: Just about the time I built a good relationship with an editor, she'd get a better gig and move on to a magazine that did nothing my work would fit.
Which was never a bit funny.
And on the same topic of things that aren't funny, Mark Streeter weighs in with this, and he's not the first to observe the damage being done to retirement funds by Trump's latest adventure, nor is this the first time I've mentioned it.
But I like the reference and particularly with the marginal wisecrack, because I doubt Trump will feel much from the market chaos as long as it doesn't bite deeply enough to harm Mar-A-Lago or his own golf membership.
And I'm only slightly sarcastic in that, because I don't think he understands his own holdings or he wouldn't go off on odd ventures and end up bankrupting them.
Plus, of course, his tax reforms have shielded people in his bracket from the vagaries of the market, at least to the point that they'll have as much money a year from now as they would if neither the reforms nor the trade war had happened.
In any case, if you're still in a 401k, it's not so bad because, over the long run, either it will come back or the whole thing will crater and we'll all be in the same basket.
For my part, I am with John Deering at Strange Brew, looking for a Semi-Retirement Home — with or without semis — because actual retirement seems a little dubious and it's fortunate that I'm doing something I'd want to keep doing anyway, because Social Security is not quite enough.
I've got a buddy from high school who is fully retired and he and his wife constantly post where they are now on Facebook. It's nothing exotic, just tooling around from forest to ocean in the Northeast and taking gorgeous pictures, but he was a millworker after school and (A) I assume has an actual pension but in any case, (B) he worked his ass off and deserves it.
And has had enough back surgery that he couldn't go back to the mills even if they hadn't all closed, or at least kicked out their unions and tightened the screws.
When I was in South Bend for college in the late 60s, we had women in their 70s and 80s working the grill at the snack bar, victims of the Studebaker bankruptcy that inspired federal pension guarantees.
And then, when I was 45 or so, the company I worked for stopped our pensions and gave us less costly (for them) 401k accounts, which they matched for a couple of years and then decided not to anymore.
And then they decided we didn't need COLAs anymore, either.
And then I decided I didn't need them.
Few people retire from the place where they started, and those five-year service plaques might as well be called "Slow Learner Awards" today.
(Cue the chorus of robber barons whining about how nobody has a work ethic or any sense of loyalty anymore.)
Supplemental Reading
Here, at Comics Beat and with a tip of the hat to Tom Spurgeon, is an interview with Mike Norton, known here for L'il Donnie which he describes as a kind of albatross around his neck, but which is at least an amusing and insightful albatross. But he has other irons in the fire and you may know him for a couple of things beyond L'il Donnie.
Tom also pointed to this article about Mike Peters, who has an exhibit up in Dayton for the next couple of weeks but who will also be at the Hustler v Falwell gathering in Minneapolis in two weeks, a free program for which you have to make reservations right now no kidding.
I interviewed Peters back at the dawn of time but his story of being hired in the middle of the Democratic Convention was a new one to me. I'm looking forward to finally meeting him in three dimensions at that confab.
Plus this
Scott Stantis finds some humor in the coming Sino-Wall-Street War, and I'm not sure it makes a grand point but it sure made for a grand laugh.
Don't complain, kids. Just show your mom this video.
Or don't. Your call.
Comments 2
Comments are closed.